The 9 Step Guide For Handling A Cheater December 3, 2008
Can I ask you a personal question? Don’t worry, your answer will be kept between you, me, and whoever else decides to read this:
Have you ever been cheated on before?
Well judging from the letters and emails that I receive daily, it sure seems that way. And while the large majority of our correspondence focuses on ways to detect infidelity, dealing with an unfaithful lover encompasses more than just being able to detect the signs of a cheater. So with that being said, let’s unveil my Nine Step Guide For Handling a Cheater.
Step 1: Check your source.
Before you begin making wild accusations, ask yourself this: Where are your suspicions coming from? Did they originate from your Grandma Ola Mae’s dream book? (”Baby, I dreamed about peas and creamed corn last night, so that must mean Bobby is cheating on you.”) If that’s your only source, then try to find more reliable information.
Step 2: Make sure it’s not you.
Could it be that your mind is playing tricks on you? If you have a history of being an overly jealous lover, then make sure you are not prematurely jumping to conclusions.
(Listen, everyone knows about the incident at church when you accused your girlfriend of being unfaithful shortly after she took communion. From what I hear, you claimed she disrespected you by eating the body and drinking the blood of another man. So sad.)
Step 3: Something’s Fishy.
You have this nauseating feeling resting at the pit of your stomach. Every bone in your body can sense the air of uncertainty surrounding your relationship. When it gets this bad, trust your instincts and find the underlying cause of your feelings.
Step 4: Seeing is believing.
It’s one thing to have a sneaking suspicion. It’s an entirely different ballgame when you actually catch your lover knee-deep in someone else. Now is the time for some decisive action.
Step 5: Take safety precautions.
If the infidelity is certain, then you have to begin thinking about your physical and mental health. In both of those areas, it’s medically unsafe to be involved with someone who’s being sexually irresponsible. After all, who wants to be stressed out while simultaneously running the risk of contracting some new strain of Sexual Ebola?
Step 6: Step out of the situation.
If you can’t give yourself unbiased advice, then step out of the situation. Think about what you told your girl Patrice when she found out about Andre’s secret love affair. In the end, you may find it easier to approach your situation by picturing someone else in it.
Step 7: Talk it out.
You have to approach your fears, and confront your significant other with the cold hard facts. Discuss your feelings, and let them know that you haven’t been this hurt since they abruptly replaced Aunt Viv on the “Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.”
Step 8: Open your ears.
Simply put, you need to listen. That’s the key to step 8. Hear them out, and get their side of the story—even if you know that they are full of it.
Step 9: Decision time.
This step separates the men from the boys and the women from Rosie O’Donnell. You have to inform them of your intentions. Will you stay? Will you go? This is the time to make that known. Once that decision is made, there’s no turning back.
MAGIC LAUNCHES ‘END BLACK AIDS’ CAMPAIGN December 3, 2008
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As part of World AIDS Day on Dec. 1, the Magic Johnson Foundation and global health care company Abbott teamed to launch the “I Stand With Magic, Campaign to End Black HIV/AIDS.”
The initiative has a social networking component that allows Facebook users to learn the facts about HIV/AIDS, get tested to know their status and to seek treatment, if needed.
“We need to take it upon ourselves to reduce the number of new infections, especially in the African-American community where they make up half of new HIV/AIDS infections,” said Earvin “Magic” Johnson, who announced in 1991 that he has HIV.
“Educating minority communities about HIV/AIDS and encouraging them to get tested, go back for their results and seek treatment is crucial to stopping the spread of HIV,” he adds. “Early detection can save your life. The earlier you know your status, the earlier you can get treatment and take action to help manage this disease.”
As previously reported, the program launched a national public service announcement campaign featuring Magic and his wife, Cookie Johnson, having a frank discussion about the need for African Americans to get educated, get tested and seek treatment for HIV/AIDS.
Directed by Spike Lee, the first PSA, “Stand,” focuses on a “call to action” for African Americans to address the epidemic in their communities. The second PSA, “Talk,” encourages women to protect themselves and talk to their partners about HIV.
SOLANGE AND BEYONCE TO PERFORM TOGETHER December 3, 2008
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Music-themed cable channel Fuse celebrates the holidays with a Knowles sisters’ intimate hometown performance – “Beyoncé and Solange: Hope for the Holidays,” a concert to benefit the Gulf Coast Ike Relief Fund.
The effort aids Texas victims of Hurricane Ike through the Survivor Foundation, a Knowles family charity helping people in need.
The event will take place in Houston at the House of Blues on Tuesday, Dec. 9. Fuse will air the concert as a one-hour special on Sunday, Dec. 21, at 10 p.m.
“It is an honor for our family to be able to give back to our hometown with a holiday concert that will air on Fuse,” said father and manager Mathew Knowles. “Tina grew up in Galveston and still has family and friends there and we’re fortunate to bring Beyoncé and Solange together to support the efforts of The Gulf Coast Ike Relief Fund through the Survivor Foundation.”
snooping UCLA worker pleads guilty; Bone Thugs reunites; ‘Isaac and the Bah Family Tree’ December 3, 2008
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Former UCLA Medical Center employee Lawanda Jackson pleaded guilty Monday to selling confidential information about Farrah Fawcett’s cancer battle to the National Enquirer and using her boss’ password to access records belonging to dozens of patients, including Britney Spears and Maria Shriver. The single charge of violating medical privacy law for commercial purposes carries a maximum sentence of 10 years in prison, followed by three years of supervised release and a $250,000 fine. Sentencing has been scheduled for May, reports E! Online.
*All five original members of Bone Thugs-N-Harmony performed in Los Angeles Monday night for the first time in 10 years, reports Allhiphop.com. Officials at Club Nokia were forced to turn away hundreds of fans, while those lucky enough to get in heard the rap group perform such tracks as “1st of Tha Month,” “I Tried,” “Notorious Thugs,” and the Grammy-winning “Crossroads.” The group is preparing to release a new album on Jan. 30 titled “Uni 5.”
*In her new book “Isaac and the Bah Family Tree,” Tampa author Adrienne C. Wilson tracks the title character on a journey to find his family tree. The adventure seeks to spark questions about family structure, ancestry, and history. The book is currently available in nationwide bookstores or can be ordered through the publisher atwww.tatepublishing.com/bookstore. “Isaac and the Bah Family Tree” is also an eLIVE title, meaning each copy contains a code redeemable for a free audio download of the book from the publisher’s Web site.
BET’S JOHNSON EXPLAINS NEW NETWORK December 3, 2008
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Black Entertainment Television founder Bob Johnson is trying to do something drastically different with his new Urban Television cable network – as the business model he has in mind is based more on the Internet than on television.
“The intent is to do something really innovative and not duplicate what I did at BET or even the traditional broadcast model,” Johnson told the Hollywood Reporter. “I don’t know if it will work, but I’m willing to give it a try.
Johnson’s idea is that his new venture would not license or acquire programs but would form partnerships with producers, who could buy blocks of airtime and sell their own advertising for a revenue split, according to the Hollywood Reporter.
As previously reported, Johnson has teamed with broadcasting company ION Media Networks in hopes of launching Urban Television on ION’s 42 channels. The joint venture has filed an application with the Federal Communications Commission for approval of a share-time license to make the network a reality.
Johnson envisions Urban Television serving black, Hispanic, gay and other minority communities with a range of public-interest programming including some focused on health care, a topic of personal interest.
Johnson is also eyeing cross-platform possibilities for the venture, which potentially could stretch to the Internet, where his firm RLJ Companies is developing a Web site, dubbed Point of U, that would have a similar programming focus.
“I like the idea of companioning a broadcast concept with an interactive platform,” he said. “Why do we always have to go back to that old model that says this is how television has to be?”
NICK BUYS MARIAH A SKI LODGE? December 3, 2008
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Nick Cannon has reportedly spent $1.5 million on a luxury five-bedroom ski lodge in Aspen, Colorado as a Christmas gift for his wife, Mariah Carey.
“Nick is clearly still in the honeymoon phase. He’s shocked all their pals by going out of his way to buy Mariah this beautiful sanctuary,” a source tells British newspaper the Daily Mirror:
“He knows Aspen is one of her favorite places in the world so this is his early Christmas present to her,” added the source.
GABRIELLE UNION HEADED TO NBC December 3, 2008
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Gabrielle Union is developing a procedural drama for NBC along with “X-Files writer/producer Frank Spotnitz, who worked with the actress briefly in ABC’s short-lived “Night Stalker” during the 2005-2006 TV season.
According to Variety, Spontitz will write the as-yet-untitled show and Union will star as a detective who must race to save someone’s life before it’s too late.
Union, who was seen last season on “Ugly Betty” and regularly appeared on “7th Heaven,” most recently has been focused on the big screen, appearing in features such as “Meet Dave” and “Tyler Perry’s Daddy’s Little Girls.
OPRAH’S SCHOOL FUNDED BY MCCAIN SUPPORTER December 3, 2008
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Fox411 columnist Roger Friedman is reporting that Oprah Winfrey, an outspoken supporter of Barack Obama, “accepted at least $5 million” for her girls school in South Africa from Harold Simmons.”
Simmons is described by Friedman as a “Dallas billionaire” and “a leading Republican donor and supporter of John McCain.”
“This past August it was revealed that Simmons was the single donor to a 527 committee called American Issues Project,” wrote Freidman in his Tuesday column. “Its only issue: to run ads linking Obama to William Ayers, the political activist who was once part of the Weather Underground. Simmons paid $2.9 million to try and make Ayers the Obama campaign’s ‘Swift Boat,’ an issue that might have sidelined permanently the Illinois senator’s chances and advance John McCain — Simmons’s candidate — to the White House.
“Nevertheless, Winfrey has cultivated her friendship with Simmons on many social fronts since 2001, resulting in his being second only to her in donating funds to her Leadership Academy in Johannesburg, South Africa.
“According to the 2006 federal tax filing for the Oprah Winfrey Operating Fund, Winfrey accepted a $1 million donation to the school from Simmons. That amount, The Dallas Morning News reported in 2007, was only part of a $5 million pledge to the Academy. Simmons is considered Dallas’s leading philanthropist to worthy causes. In this case, though, it might have been unnecessary, since Winfrey herself has donated over $60 million to the school.”
Continue reading Friedman’s column here.
COURTNEY B. VANCE BOOKS A PILOT December 3, 2008
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Fresh from a guest run opposite wife Angela Bassett in NBC’s “ER,” Courtney B. Vance has been cast opposite Jack Davenport in ABC’s new drama pilot “Flash Forward.”
According to the Hollywood Reporter, the series is based on Robert J. Sawyer’s sci-fi novel and chronicles the chaos that ensues after everyone in the world blacks out for 2 minutes and 17 seconds and has a mysterious vision of the future that changes lives forever.
Vance will play Stan Wedeck, the Los Angeles bureau chief of the FBI. Davenport will star as Lloyd Simcoe, who is trapped in Northern California when the event occurs and struggles to reach his son in a Southern California hospital.
David S. Goyer will direct the project, as well as co-produce with Brannon Braga and ABC Studios.
For six seasons, Vance played assistant district attorney Ron Carver on NBC’s “Law & Order: Criminal Intent.” Vance and his wife also are shepherding several projects through their Bassett/Vance Prods., including “Erasure,” a feature adaptation of Percival Everett’s novel penned by Dwayne Johnson-Cochran.
